I've been sort of losing it for the last couple of months. I'll admit it. I think that I took the whole actually being divorced thing harder than I thought, because I feel like it all started around then. Basically, I gained like 15 pounds, starting feeling really crappy all the time, and blew all my savings on a combination of paying my taxes, buying gifts for everyone I know, and going out to eat a million times, which probably contributed to the weight gain.
I actually owe more than I did last month. This hasn't happened since I started this in January 2008. I feel like the people must feel on the Biggest Loser, when you know they know they f*ed up, but for some reason they are still shocked and saddened when the scale reads +2 and everyone gasps and cries.
Did you gasp and cry? I did when I paid my bills this week.
I don't feel like I have any answers right now. I'm going to sleep on it, but no "I can do this!!" from me tonight. It would have been my 6th wedding anniversary today, and I think that I'm sad. Who'd a thunk it.