27 September 2008

dreams instead of nightmares

I wasn't writing this blog when things were really bad, I started it about 6 months after I went back to work and my husband moved out (which happened less than a month apart). But things used to be really bad. I had to pay bills with credit cards sometimes, and if I managed to get ahead and get some money into savings, my husband would take it. I would lay awake at nights worrying, running different scenarios through my head, and spent countless hours working on pay-off plans with my Microsoft Money software.

While I'm not debt free (yet),now I sleep at night. I have back up plans, savings that are safe, and enough income to pay more than the minimum balance. Instead of worrying about how to make it through, when I lay in bed I dream of what I will do when the credit cards are gone. Student loans will get paid off, too. A downpayment for a house, perhaps. I imagine what it would be like to pay cash for a car, or a nice vacation. I dream of putting money in IRAs, 503b's and donating to charity.

I realize that all those things cost money, too, and I'll probably never have "enough"- but I also know how far I've come.

1 comment:

manda said...

I didn't know it was that bad...If it doesnt kill you it only makes you stronger right?!